Friday, September 5, 2008

Emmitt Smith's 2008 Season Preview

Bet you didn't know that I knew Emmitt Smith! I'm going to let Emmitt gaze into his crystal Emmittball and bravely forecast the 2008 NFL season. Go ahead Emmitt, you have the floor.


Thanks, Vern! Let's get things startled here, NFC to AFC, by divisions.

Green Bay looks good behind Aaron Rodgers in the preseason, but Rodgers is no Bert Favre. Bert Favre was a legend, he still is a legend, he even drives an Acura Legend. So it's gonna be hard to unplant his presents there in Green Bay. Still, I think with the talent around him, he'll be able to get them into the wild card position. Detroit and Chicago are also planning on fielding football teams this season.

I like Carolina in the East, especially when Stevey Smith gets back out on the football field and does things. He's an exploding player, someone capable of blowing a wide open game. Jake Delhomme still has the toolbox to make the throws that he has to throw, and they drafted a strong runner in Johnathan Stewart. Julius Peppers is also a nature freak on the defense.

Rounding the division out, I like New Orleans to compete for the playoffs but ultimate fall short of the playoffs. But with Drew Brees and Marques Coldsore, you never really know. They could win this division, because when this offense gets going, especially with Reggie "I should have been a Bengal" Bush back there running the ball, they can turn the lights out. Tampa Bay's also got a shot to win the division here, with that preferentially strong defense. Atlanta will probably struggle to win football games, although with Matt Ryan they've got a glitter of hope for the future of this fratchise.

In the west, Seattle should once again run away from the division and win it. There isn't too much competition for them, and Matt Hasselbeck just seems to know how to win the games. I like the defense as well with Lofa Tatupu back there drunk-driving through tackles with his legs and making strong hits. The offensive line is also a point for strength, and they expect Julius Jones to play well on offense at the running position.

The rest of the division is pretty tapioca, with both Arizona and San Francisco and St. Louis struggling for years past. I don't see any of these teams making steps and jumping over the Seahawks into the driving seats of the division car. I just don't see it happened.

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You've gotta like New England's Patriots to repeat out of the East over in the American Football Confidence. Timmy Brady is going to air it up all night long with Randy Moss, and the defense is also coming back old and strong. I like New England in a landfill over the rest of the decision.

The Jets, however, have Bert Favre, and this should be good enough for 10 wins by itself. I like the Jets to make the wild card out of the division. Also competing will be Miami and Buffalo, two solid teams, but two teams that have been placed between a bunch of hard rocks. They are going to have to shock the whirl to even make the wild card this season.

I like the Pittburgh Steelers out of the North, because they are a smashed out football team that loves to run the football in between the tadpoles. They drafted a bruised runner this year in Rashard Menthol, and he should add to the one-two punt they have back there with Willie Parker. The defense remains strong with solid linebackers and linefronters on the defensive line. An experienced field genital in Ben Roethlisberger and a great possessive receiver like Hines Ward should entribute to a division champion.

In the rest of this division, we have Cleveland hoping to play on their surprised finish just out of the playoff last year. Derek Anderson just signed a huge condo in the offseason, and he looks poisoned to put up even bigger numbers to prove to the doubting people who doubt him this year. He's playing to silence the crickets. However, I think they will miss out on post office play once again this year. Baltimore has a strong defense, as usual, with God's Linebacker back there making tackles between the sidelines and double murders outside of them, but I can't persee them winning enough games on offense to deplete for the division. Cincinnatti has had alot of turnoil in the offseason and probably needs their oil changed, lol. I don't think they will win anymore than 6 games of football this season.

I like the Colts in their division, as usual, which looks to be the strongest in the National FL. Peyton Manning is one of the best quarterbacks to ever lace up the skates, and he's going to get the job done. Marvin Harrison shot a guy in the offseason, but still looks to put up strong numbers alongside Reggie Wayne. I won't stop picking the Colts until they give me a reason to not pick the Colts anymore.

Jacksonville should challenge for the title and comes back strong this year. I like them to make a wild card just like they made last year. They've got a great running offense and quarterback but could use some better receiving corpse. The defense is tout once again and should make things miseryous for the opposing offense. The Texans look to be much improved, but should just fall short this year along with Tennessee. But you know what, when you've got Vince Young back there, anything can happen. By anything, I mean any result possible during a football play can indeed happen, such as a run or an overthrown pass or a touchdown to the other team. Vince just wins games and in the NFL, the line at the bottom is to just win the games.

I like San Diego to win the West recently. Philip Rivers is a good quarterback and LT is the best player in football, which must be true because everybody says it all the time. Shawne Merriman is an idiot, but should tackle alot of guys while he's out there on the field. The secondary is also strong with Quentin Jammer and Cromartie, who warrantied that he would break the NF League insurrection record this year.

Denver should compete with Jay Cutler, but I don't think they'll make the playoffs. Oakland and Kansas will probably struggle again this year, but Oakland's defense should keep them on some games. Jamarcus Russell will get to show us why he can do this year.

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In the NFC, I like the Cowboys to come out to the Super Bowl and match up against the Patriots, who I think will be hungry to go back to the Super Bowl. I like the Cowboys to shock the world this year in the Super Bowl and beat the Patriots. But hey, there's a wrong season ahead of us and this is why the games get played on the football field. Remember that predictions through the Emmittball are to be taken with a salt grater. Let's play some football!

2 comments:

Bored said...

I just read this. Musta been in FLA. I love emmit smith.

Business Horse said...

KSK started doing the damn Emmitt Smith bit months after I debuted it in the Swamp. Damn it.