Friday, December 12, 2008

I got a double bed

One's to sleep on, the other one's to get my freak on. It's all for the ladies.

However, the duvet cover on this bed is filled with 400-threadcount NONSENSE, Cassidy. I don't care if this song is 5 years old at this point. I heard it recently and was reminded how ridiculous this line was. Why was he allowed to get away with that? A double bed is one bed! You sleep on and freak on the same bed, just like the rest of us who don't take advantage of private booths in Amsterdam. You freak on it. And then you sleep on it. How weird would that be anyway, if you had like, two single beds in one room and you're banging this cougar on one and then you gotta be like...ok, cougar, well, thanks for touching my penis, but I gotta go sleep on that other bed right there. Yeah. That's the bed I sleep on. I just get my freak on on this one. Thanks for your time.


Cassidy used to be a mixtape superstar back in the early 2000s, just like 50 Cent was slightly beforehand. Well, Cassidy came out to the world with this stupid ass song and I was hugely disappointed with his entire effort on that CD, but I think this line is why he never became a star. Karma was like...whatthefuck did you just say? Don't you know what a double bed is? Have you not been to Sears? 50 Cent fared slightly better, even though he sucks at rap. Crazy how things work out.

So, I guess I'm going to try to procure another bed to put in my room, just so I can live Cassidy's dream. I'm gonna be the guy banging the cougars and saying...sorry, but I get my sleep on in that bed. I trust you understand, coug.

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