Monday, October 13, 2008
I still hold this microphone like a penis
Wow, are you as excited as I am, Pierre?
- I sure am, Mike. Another hockey season is underway. This is one of my favorite times of the year, what with all the excitement that every team has. A new beginning! Like a phoenix rising out of the ashes that are the previous season. And I really can't help but hold the microphone like a penis while I describe it.
I know what you are saying, Pierre. The only thing I like to think that I have a grasp on as well as I have a grasp on this upcoming hockey season is this microphone, which I artfully hold just like I would a penis.
- I'm pretty sure I've held microphones like penises for my entire adult life. I hold this microphone with a grip that is tight but also pleasurable for the microphone...just like I would if it were a penis.
Firmly but gently, right?
Really can't beat it, as far as sound quality and comfort is concerned.
- I'm just glad it's not an actual penis. I mean, the sound that it picks up would be nowhere near as good as this microphone.
But the way I hold it, even if it were a real penis, I'm sure it would stay hard. But, it wouldn't ejaculate. Really, that's the same way I hold the mic.
- It's all about maintaining that consistency.
It's a very difficult line to straddle.
- There's a bit of a grey area in there.
Yeah, and mainly, the only way to get to this point is experience. With both microphones and penises.
- Gosh, Mike, you get me fired up with this talk.
Let's take a quick commercial break, Pierre. We'll be right back. ;)